I’m obnoxious. And drunk. But what else is new?

Alright. I’ve had half a bottle of wine and I’m about to write the shit out of this comeback blog post. As in, once I’m through, this post is going to need a cigarette and a phone call to its ex to rub in just how much it won the break-up. And then I’m just going to be all, “yeah whatever, love. Go make me a sandwich and let yourself out.” Because really, I’ve gone a month not just without posting anything…but without even looking at this blog. No seriously. I replaced all blogging time with videos of Santana on Glee and dreaming about how happy we could be together. It’s been an awesome month.

Let’s review: 1) I don’t live the crazy, stressful, manic depressive, bipolar life of an advertising agency professional anymore. Now any psychological problems (I like to call them psychological opportunities) I possess are all me, baby. 2) I work out of my home office now which is an interesting throwback to when I started this blog while unemployed except I have enough money to bring more booze into the mix. 3) I’m actually, for the first time in years and years, genuinely and thoroughly, in every possible wayily–dare I say it out loud?–HAPPY.

Not that the past ohhhhh FIVE YEARS have been terrible or anything, but I feel like now…RIGHT NOW things are coming together the way I always wanted them to, the way people told me they probably never would, and the way that makes me feel like all the clusterfuckery has been absolutely, positively worth it.

The crippling mental and physical shape I was in at the end of the summer, the book deal I ended up defaulting on against all rational reasons encouraging me to just go with something that didn’t feel right, the money and time I invested into blogging even when I had no reason to believe it would ever pay off, the people I’ve burned in the process who I probably should have just burned a whole lot sooner…I mean, even if this is as good as it all gets for me, I’m so totally satisfied.

Guys? I’m getting PAID to write about places where I like to eat and drink! And when they’re not paying me to do that, they’re paying me to go EAT AND DRINK WITH PEOPLE. This shit is bananas, b-a-n-a-n-a-s. I’ve gone from being criticized and feeling like I’m failing all day, every day, to starting and ending every day with real conversations with people who are so! very! excited! to! talk! about! their! favourite! everythings!

Plus every now and then, and ohmigodthisissuchapainintheass, they insist I go to places like San Francisco and Portland to eat and drink THERE except with more Nicole, Jamie and Doniree. Sometimes folks are all, “but the travel must be hard, right, being away from home and all?” but I’m too busy LOVING EVERYTHING SINCE THE DAWN OF TIME TO NOTICE.

I know, I know…I should bring my level of excitement out of the ‘obnoxious range’ but I really can’t so you’re just going to have to deal with it for now, especially since I haven’t even finished. When I’m not busy with Yelp, I’m running a business with the two people who have pushed me to the greatest heights I’ve managed to achieve in the past three years of my life. That’s right.

When they say you can’t pick all the good stuff and throw away the bad? THEY’RE LYING BECAUSE YOU TOTALLY, TOTALLY CAN AND THAT SCARES THE HELL OUT OF THEM. If you can shake the fear, you’ll realize there’s a whole other life out there for you…s’all I’m sayin’.

So there. You’re caught up, I’m back to blogging, and it’s going to be one hell of a year for all of us.